How many times does it seem that the spark has appeared, the atmosphere has warmed up, everything seems like there is going to be a happy ending of pleasure, but something has frustrated the plans? It seems impossible for some people to think that just the idea of getting intimate or having sex might be unappealing to someone. It may be due to what is known as anxiosexuality. Because everyone knows that human beings want to have sex twenty-four hours a day, right?
What is Anxiosexuality?
This term refers, as confusing as it may seem at first, to the anxiety and stress that sex inspires for some people. A feeling that is usually temporary and that causes a decrease in sexual desire and attraction. Something like a temporary voluntary celibacy. You just don’t want to have sex.
Hundreds of questions begin to invade the mind. Some like, where should you put your hands, if you are kissing well… Questioning every move, feeling awkward and thinking about everything that could go wrong. Which, like Murphy’s law, anything that can go wrong will go wrong. And that’s when the nerves, the tension and the rejection of the whole situation start.
Why is that? If they say that sex reduces stress… It’s true, but what they don’t say is that it also generates stress. Especially when it’s the first time.
But anxiosexuality does not affect all people equally. It depends on personality and the ability to manage problems and one’s emotions. There are some, for whom a concern for work is enough, while others, who may be ending the world, who still have a desire.
So, how to avoid anxiosexuality?
Nowadays, it seems that everyone has to be super productive. Take advantage of time and don’t stop doing things. When anxiosexuality, mainly derives from that way of thinking. It’s important to stop, rest, relax and take a deep breath.
Above all, what is recommended on any occasion is not to force the issue. Let yourself go and if any tension or nerves start to be generated do something to relax.
That something can be from taking a deep breath, taking a shower or bath, brushing your hair, watching a chapter of your favorite show, brushing your teeth, cooking, watching kitten videos or dancing on Instagram, Youtube or TikTok… Anything that manages to calm each person down.
Although it may seem silly, it helps a lot to know how to relax, because you already start the situation by seeing everything from another point of view. Perhaps in this way anxiosexuality will not be such a problem and can be overcome more quickly.
When pleasure becomes torment
How many times has a thing been enjoyed before, now not anymore? And now, in the midst of a global pandemic, how many things are truly enjoyable?
Because doing something and being able to enjoy it doesn’t just mean that you enjoy it. Just like sex, it depends on a lot of things. Among them, mainly, those that affect the emotional and mental state.
There are an infinite number of sexual practices, postures, fetishes, fantasies, toys, places and even moments in which you can practice sexual relations and enjoy yourself. The most important thing and the key to be able to do it, at the end, is to be relaxed and comfortable, to have desire and opportunity. With that base you can have the most pleasant experiences.
For this reason, self-knowledge and personal growth is good. To be aware of what affects us and how it does so in order to discover the best way to manage it. Because beyond anxiosexuality, being able to manage one’s emotions is very important. To have an emotional balance and stability to be able to continue advancing in life.
Balance that many people find relieving and venting in the arms of a partner, lover or escort.
To be or not to be anxious
There are more than seven billion people in the world and each and every one of them is unique and different. Each one with their more and less, better days, worse days, better jobs, worse jobs, one or another problem, nobody is perfect. And of course you are not worse for being anxious.
Each person follows their own processes and lives their experiences in a different way. You just need to know and respect them and try to work through them. Who knows, perhaps anxiosexuality is an opportunity to rethink sexuality about oneself, to inform oneself about new practices or simply to rediscover oneself.
To forget everything that one is supposed to know. He “should feel this way” or “should enjoy it”. Spinning the same thing in the head and routine are the greatest enemies of attraction and desire. I wish sex was the answer and solution to all problems besides sexual tension. But when it’s good, it’s better. Or is it?