Being in the middle of the action or starting to get hotter but having one of the most important parts of your body fail – is there a worse nightmare for a person with a penis? Having a moment losing a boner can become a problem and completely cut off the desire and the mood.
The penis symbol of virility
Generally, when talking about sex, the first thought that comes to mind is penetration. When the urge is strong but a condom is missing, or when you are simply so horny that waiting is not an option, it seems the most satisfying and quickest option.
Even in Japan there is a festival around the penis, known as Kanamara Matsuri. Because this is a very sensitive area and usually identifiable with the male gender. Because it seems that the harder and bigger it gets, the better lover it will be.
That’s why the simple fact of thinking that it can fail, especially in front of a possible sexual partner, can be worrying. Mostly because on the one hand there is the thought of how he will react and on the other hand the possible ways to solve it.
Causes of losing a boner
An erection occurs when arousal occurs and a significant amount is concentrated in the genital area. So when it doesn’t occur or the thing “falls off”, that’s when concern and fear arise.
This type of situation can have very different reasons. Because it can be very “normal” to happen and to suffer as a sporadic.
Among the reasons why this usually happens are the following. Although it should be borne in mind that the effects of these tend to get worse the more intense and the longer they are prolonged over time.
Firstly, it may be the result of poor rest. Lack of energy, too little sleep and poor sleep affect mental capacities and the general functioning of the body. So getting the matter up can be complicated.
On the other hand, another of the things that affect and can cause stress, anxiety or nerves. Very “normal” nowadays due to the pace of work and life we tend to lead. The excess of all that “mental noise”. Sex requires a certain amount of concentration or letting oneself go because, despite what is often thought, the brain is also a sexual organ. It is impossible to enjoy yourself while thinking about the shopping list or all the things you still have to do, for example.
If you’re losing a boner it’s important to take into account pressure and self-demand
The expectations caused by all those worries and even fears about satisfying your sexual partner and living up to what is expected. All this pressure tends to turn into nerves and increased tension that causes a physical and mental disconnection that can lead to lost his bone.
In addition to all this, there are always a lot of complexes, embarrassments and insecurities of our own. A few extra kilos, lack of volume or size in some key areas of the body… Nobody is perfect but we all seek to be the most desired and to provoke as much as possible.
In addition to all these internal and emotional reasons that can cause a losing a boner or erectile dysfunction, there are other external ones. For example, drugs, alcohol and even poor diet that leads to obesity. This is mainly because they affect the metabolism and the blood, which is responsible for causing the erection and making the penis grow.
Looking for the guilty
And it is not all about lack of desire. Because it seems that if a man can’t get it up, it must be the fault of the sexual partner who is not enough to excite him or of the man himself who is not “man enough”.
There are many reasons why this can happen and it is important to know how to react when it does. The first thing is to take the importance and pressure off. Understand that it can happen to anyone and as long as it is not something that happens continuously on many occasions, there is no need to worry.
Because there are times when not even the most beautiful and hottest model, celebrity or escort is able to get it up, just as the hottest man is not always able to get a woman wet and aroused. There are people and people and moments and moments.
The best thing to do is to try to forget about everything and focus on what is important. Enjoy the company and sex. Let yourself go and feel. But if it is still something that does not completely disappear from your mind. You can always consult an expert such as a doctor or sexologist for more information. Especially if the losing a boner has not happened occasionally, but is prolonged over time.
And if at some point it happens unexpectedly, it is the best time to get creative. Try some experiences like King Out (which you can discover in another post of this blog), oral sex, BDSM, tantra… There is pleasure beyond penetration. You just have to dare to experience it.